Wisdom: Knowing what you don’t know

Zan Boag wrote in issue 50 of the New Philosopher “ While intelligence can be demonstrated, expertise displayed, and opinions aired with confidence, wisdom is much harder to spot. It often appears as hesitation rather then decisiveness, silence rather than speech; a refusal to act when action is expected.” p.3

I would tell my Social Work students that one of the most important attributes of a good Social Worker is to know what you don’t know. If you know what you don’t know you are motivated to do some research, seek consultation, refer to a resource more appropriate than one’s own service competence.

I also remind my psychotherapy clients that sometimes not doing something is doing something. Knowing when to act and when to retreat is one of the hallmarks of wisdom.

Knowing what you don’t know allows a person to investigate and inquire out of curiosity and a search for new information, meaning, purpose, and truth.

Socrates taught that one of the hallmarks of wisdom is to become increasingly aware of how much one doesn’t know.

To act with certainty, rigidity, and the need to be right at all costs can do great harm to individuals and relationships.

Boag writes further “Modern life doesn’t appear to reward wisdom. We are encouraged to decide quickly, speak confidently, and defend our views. Yet wisdom often requires the opposite: the willingness to pause, to revise, and to accept that the situation at hand may not fit our preferred narrative.” p.3

The need to be right makes people do stupid things. Rather than admit doubt which they think may show weakness, they try to fit round pegs into square holes frustrating themselves and damaging the things around them.

Admitting doubt, tolerating ambiguity, recognizing and acknowledging when one is wrong, or could be wrong is a sign of a special kind of strength called “resilience.” Resilience allows a person to be flexible and bend rather than be brittle, fragile, and shatter.

People deserve second chances, third chances, fourth chances and the encouragement to search for a better way. The ability to shift gears, to consider options, to be open to other possibilities is another of the hallmarks of wisdom.

Peter asked Jesus, “How many times do I need to forgive my brother, seven?” Jesus replied, “No. You need to forgive 70 times 7.” Matthew 18:20-22

Jesus was very wise.